Wednesday, April 30, 2008

fourth of july - stephen kellogg and the sixers

you live and learn, me, well i learned to let go
parents and bosses and people who don't want you to grow
i think that anything that you want to you can do
& no one is going to tell me just who the hell i should sing to

& this, this is my life
on the 4th of july
it isn't much, but at least it's mine



(this is mine and nothing, nobody is going to ever take this away
it's a blue print of your life
ill see ya when it's over
It's a journey)

you left out the orphans

blurb from time out new york, april 17-23, 2008
i miss you
"it's hard to lose your parents in your early twenties. youre just starting to do something interesting with your life, and you want to have your parents there so you can say 'hey! look what i did!' ive had roomates that are still in that bratty phase, and it's hard becuse im like, 'you dont know how youll feel when theyre gone, and theyre GONNA be gone.'
i think about my parents everyday - especially when something funny happens or if i have a question. it's like an amputated arm you still try to use - it never goes away". -j. odell



my freakin' life story.

Monday, April 28, 2008

as if i needed another reason to love sally field.



an absolutely heart-wrenching, emotional, true to heart story about a mother who is dying from cancer. sally field blew me away. she is hands down, such a brilliant actress to begin with, and her role in this film makes me give her so much more credit and respect. the grieving process was shown throughout this entire film, and different forms of grieving were portrayed through the children. i related to all four of them on so many different levels. everything about this film was REAL. there was no fluff around the fact that their mother was dying. overall: such a great film, and really enlightens those who have not experienced death or cancer.

monday's jam:

everything about this song and this video is an exact portrayal of my life right now.



(although i am greatly aware i am an old soul, sometimes i pretend to be brave and pretend i am a new soul).

Sunday, April 27, 2008

missing:

where did his blog go?



umm, hello. i am/was addicted. i felt like i was becoming part of his life and then he just up's and leaves.

my thought EXACTLY:

Saturday, April 26, 2008

literature & libations: may 2008 selection

michelle and i decided to form a book club. this is what coming from a family of writers, readers, artists, english teachers, and home-bodies does to you, apparently. and this is what happens when two literature snob's come together and form a friendship. our first book was one of my choices, in which michelle very willingly agreed to. (thank the heavens).



"Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta.

She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita."

those words. beautiful. already in love. and! more beautiful. english is not vladimir nabokov's first, or even second language. wow.

current motto:

Friday, April 25, 2008

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

for MB.

friends. hearts. earth. you.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008



i am in love. k thanks bye.

Monday, April 21, 2008

the last lecture.

"i am dying soon, and i am choosing to have fun, today, tomorrow, and every day i have left" -dr randy pausch.

below are two videos i think everyone needs to watch, and learn from. dr. randy pausch is a professor who gave his 'last lecture' at carnegie mellon this past fall. randy is dying from pancreatic cancer. instead of talking about his cancer and what he wishes he could accomplish, he speaks about what he did accomplish. he celebrates life each day, and celebrates the chance that he was able to live a life, he always dreamed of. he doesnt dwell on the past. he has no regrets. he lives for today. he is truly such a mentor in today's society, and his story is so inspirational and has touched not just my heart, but so many others. he is a legend.

his last lecture (revised from when he was on oprah):



his full last lecture:



"i only gave this lecture for three people, and when they're older. theyll watch it"



i would be absolutely lying if i said i didnt have dry eyes right now. i am so awe-stricken. it's people like him, who truly make a difference in today's world. we all need people like him. we all need to lead by example. kudos to this beautiful, geniune individual, who will never be forgotten for his courage, words and advice.

crawled out from under my bed.

something about warm weather inspires me.

when i was in pleasantville, ny, a few weeks back, timbo and i went to some of the quaint little antique shops and i luckily managed to make out like a bandit on some super cute pendants. at the time, i knew they would be perfect for some jewlery, but when would i find the time?

well my friends, today was the day.

i broke out all of my beads and got to crafting. i managed to put together this dear little charm necklace for my good friend, becca's 25th birthday. i have a pretty eccentric, loud, sense of style and always accessorize, and she seems to have a similar style (after all, she did live in soho! you know the girls got style just from that!).

here is a sneak peek:



the detailing:


the charms are simple: a burnt orange clay flower, an open heart, a toogle that holds a feather, beaded heart and statue of liberty (becca is from MD, so this is her way to remember NY when she leaves us in a year).

i am kind of in love with it. i think it's the second piece of jewlery i have ever made that screams MELISSA! all over it.

mr. chess

sometimes i forget that i got to meet this beautiful, talented, geniune man. how do you let a moment like that slip your mind?

Sunday, April 20, 2008

the trevor project.



inspired by that jem of an award-winning film, trevor.
needs to be watched. discussed. enforced.

the trevor project.
saving young lives.

i need to be a part of something this big and moving and beautiful.

why i love summer:

my younger readers should disregard this post.

i have a new obsession.



bluepoint blueberry ale. i thought my obsession for sam adams / stella were high, until this delicious beer came into my life last night at effin gruven (which also may be a new obsession because of the hard-to-find beer selection and chill atmosphere). blue point blueberry ale - hands down: best decision i have ever made. i want to bathe in this beer, it is so good. and not to mention, it's brewed on long island! what is better then that? only problem: kind of difficult to find because of it's unique flavor. and it's also BARELY offered at any bars on the island, and not even a lot in brooklyn (which is seemingly VERY shocking). it's a treat. just the smell of it is (honestly) orgasmic.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

make a difference.

inspiration. it runs deep.



Somaly Mam grew up without parents in Cambodja. No one knew where they where. “When we went to sleep I saw the other children cuddle up close to their mothers. Me... I was by myself, freezing. I felt so alone.”

When she was twelwe she was sold the first time, to the local merchant to pay off a debt. When she was 15 she was sold again – to a brothel in Phnom Pehn. She tried to resist, but was beaten, raped and locked up every time she escaped.
In the end they broke her down.

But one day came a new girl to the brothel. She was only 10 and Somaly didn’t want that girl be destroyed as her, so she gave her all her money and helped her escape. As punishment she was beaten for several hours and locked in a narrow cage to show the other girls what happened to those who made resistance. After that, Somaly became one of the most obedient sex slaves in the brothel.

But when an American customer gave her $3,000 she bought free all ten girls on her brothel. After eight years Somaly was finally free and decided to save more girls from slavery. Now it has been eleven years and over 3000 girls have gained a better life thanks to Somaly. She and her organization AFESIP has built three safe homes where the girls get food, healthcare, a chance to go to school and safety, warmth and love.

But it has been a long and dangerous struggle. She lives under constant death threat and in 2006 her own 14 year old daughter Champa was kidnapped. She was drugged, raped and sold to a brothel on the border to Thailand. After four days she was found. Then Somaly was close to giving up. But Champa made her continue. “No, mom, I do have you and will be allright. But what will happen to all the other girls if you stop?”

Somaly Mam is one of our times biggest heroes. She was recently in Stockholm to receive the World’s Children Prize (www.childrensworld.org). Bless her!

--
somaly needs to be in my life. right now. she needs to be my hand-in-hand mentor. i want her courage. her brave face. her two feet. and her heart next to mine.


he needs to cross my path. one day. very. very. very soon.

Friday, April 18, 2008

homage to the body.

breathing in, breathing out breathing in, breathing out
like a wave the breath arises from and dissolves back into the source,
guiding us into the stillness, we remember who we are
radiant, luminous, eternal, energy
arising at birth, dissolving at death
back into the source.



it has been a week too long.
my mind cannot wait to feel peace again tomorrow.
Love Today

Thursday, April 17, 2008

the world deeper into my WWW.

are you there god, it's me, melissa.

new favorite. new obsession.

dear-god.net

already shared and squeed over with MB.

no matter your religion, beliefs, background, ethnicity, ANY OF THAT, this little website is a keeper. a site of so many haunting and emotional photos and letters. cries for help, laughter, tears. all written to "god".

every letter to "god" has a matching photo.
beautiful. keeper. soul-foul. real life. haunting. i have tears. real ones. they all speak my mind. (why is everyone speaking my mind lately?)

safe to say, it's a URL you will want to bookmark. it questions life. we all need to question life. what's in store for us? do we have a plan? why do bad things happen to good people? who decides our lives?

think. explore. thank me later.

photography.

what! what! what!

"I love the part of music, that it can take you over and you can trust it…I want to make music that, when women listen to it, they can be inside themselves again. To make dance music is even better, because then they can be dancing together, with other women feeling inside of themselves." -k.h.



why am i just learning, NOW, that kathleen hanna (of le tigre! bikini kill!) taught a graduate art class at NYU this fall!!? god. i would have put together a portfolio and been a faux-art student if i would have known this. she is my hero. my idol. my inspiration. everything about her! to listen to her speak and teach and lecture?!?! totally would have been there.

"The whole idea [of riot grrrl] was that women and girls could define what it meant and that there are a million different ways to be feminist or womanist or to be pro-woman or anti-misogyny and that it's not one person can decide that. We didn't want to be a corporation with a mission statement. I think that was an interesting strategy. People are still defining it for themselves." - k.h.

young at heart.

i have been patiently waiting for this film.

two of my all time favorite things: elderly people and music.



i am crying. they are on jay leno right now. tears down my face. biggest smile on my face. cheering in living room. some of the most energetic and passionate individuals in the world. i want to sit with them and listen to their life stories and sing together. my dream.

ps: why arent my grandparents in this?? hello! they forgot sebna!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

paisley prints.



worn on my body with a big smile and an exploding heart. my mind really does (!) speak from my tshirts, comfy (cuffed) jeans and flip flops. i love today. moments. sunshine. air. love. smiles. geniune people.

"spread love everywhere you go. let no one ever come to you without leaving happier".

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

i am someone's inspiration.

my fourteen year old cousin recently won the 'go make a difference' award for her ninth grade class. upon winning this award, they need to write a little paper on who the most inspirational person is in their life and why.

she put me.



"if your actions inspire others to dream more,
learn more, do more and become more,
you are a leader."

finally! my people get praise.


"journalists are the most important people in the world"

being a former editor-in-chief of a newspaper, a staff reporter for a paper for three years, an intern for two years, a freelancer for seven years, copy editor for a year, and then working for a national newspaper for one a half years... not to mention numerous journalism awards and a journalism degree under my belt, mtv has shined through with this beauty.

i am a newspaper geek. this makes the geekiness level inside me soar. part of me is amanda.

Monday, April 14, 2008

music inspires health.

no new york dates, but check and see if an area near you is hosting this beautiful, inspirational event. beautiful artists and such a great cause.

music inspires health (dot) org

music, charity and helping adolescents = melissa's cup of tea.

black cadillacs.

my itunes shuffle did a great thing this evening by bringing modest mouse back into the mix, and more importantly, back into my life.

empowerment! (much needed)



"don't ask yourself what the world needs. ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go do it. because what the world needs is people who have come alive." — harold thurman whitman

Sunday, April 13, 2008

love has been waiting.


i have so many little flowers.
i want to hug them all.
right now.

“Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.”

change.



i am bangin' it these days. i am searching. i am growing. i am feeling. i am living. i am loving. i am missing. i am content. i am uneasy. i am emotional. i am hurt. i am fixing. i am expanding. i smile. i cry. i laugh. i speak. i think. i write. i am watching. i am hoping. i am patiently waiting. i am stressed. i am worth it. this is worth it. i am everything i can amount to.
furthermore.
i am me.

"we do not grow absolutely, chronologically. we grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. we grow partially. we are relative. we are mature in one realm, childish in another. the past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. we are made up of layers, cells, constellations." -anais nin.

eventful.


this weekend i had to distinct pleasure to not only represent my graduate campus at open house and participate in my first roundtable discussion, but i also managed to see an open rehearsal for a new off-broadway show, port authority while i was spending my day upstate. to be honest. i really felt like an old lady as i spent my saturday in dobb's ferry and pleasantville. i went to numerous antique shops and fairs. went to a tea room. made friends in the pleasantville book shop, got sunburnt and felt very sophisticated, to say the least.



as per this. conor mcpherson, let's face it, never fails to doubt or let anyone down. this is another example of his moving, heart-wrenching peices of art. the psych grad student in me is doing dances because the overall themes and plot summaries and how all the characters suffer the same EXACT! problems at different stages is portrayed in such a beautiful and remarkable way. and there is no doubt in my mind that the casting was an exceptional choice. i was moved to tears a few times during the show, and that was just at the open rehearsal!! can you imagine. previews are still a few weeks away, so the actors can do nothing but better themselves from this point forward. i was floored by how amazing the content was bought to life.
suffice to say, i am counting down until opening night and crossing my fingers i can have a run-in with conor one day. he needs to know how remarkable and inspirational he is. and thanked, for all the beautiful things he writes. i urge all of you, to support this show that is bring produced by the atlantic theatre company. i cannot talk it up anymore. it's unlike any other.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

cherry blossoms.

i would feel more optimistic about a bright future for man
if he spent less time proving that he can outwit Nature
and more time tasting her sweetness
and respecting her seniority.
-- e.b. white

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

to new beginings.

take this sinking boat and point it home.
we still got time.



new obsession. him. her. the little film that could. the music. the beauty.
no matter how far your dreams are, it's possible.
MAKE ART. MAKE ART. MAKE ART.


hope, at the end of the day, connects us all.

xo.

3 a.m.

It's strange because sometimes, I read a book, and I think I am the people in the book.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

tuesday's task:










Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each.

Monday, April 7, 2008

my best friend.



"and if difficulties were necessary to increase the splendor of the effort, what could be harder for a restless, ambitious girl than to give up her own hopes, plans, and desires and cheerfully live for others?" -lousia may alcott, "little women"

i believe that line from a beautiful piece of literature was written about my grandmother and i when we were both werent looking. and when we both weren't aware. i may still not be aware that it was written with me in mind, but my grandmother begs to differ.

my grandmother is hurting tonight, and i am hurting alongside of her. i ask that all of you, pull together your little hearts and keep her in your thoughts and prayers. keep me your wishes too, as my grandmothers heart is instilled in my heart, too.

xo.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

my mind speaks from my t-shirts.



with beautiful weather, comes my t-shirt collection. totally forgot about this favorite. snagged it from target a few seasons ago. target, lately, always has the illest (yes, i said illest) collection of graphic/vintage T's. ranging from rolling stones T's to a vast collection of beatles T's to T's supporting go green efforts and world peace. this one, being one of my favorites. i love it. i love t-shirts. i love colors. i love prints. i love going through my summer clothes and falling in love all over again with my favorite t's. and more importantly, i love peace.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

reaching out is what lonely people do.

i went through a huge ryan adams kick, i think, during my junior year of college. i was pretty in love. he was all i listened to. im sure i still have a ryan adams tee somewhere mixed in with my greek week, rush, college and other tee's i bought back home with me from my tiny apartment in central pa. i mean, let's face it. the man, ryan adams, is genius. end of story. sad to say, the love faded, or perhaps i got bored with the music as i began work in the real world. one or the other.

however. all good things come back into my life sooner then later. i made no hesitations to pick up 'easy tiger' when it was relased. gave it a few listens. moved on. whatever. good album ryan adams, now let me focus on other things. apparently that is what my mind said. my dear friend stef on the other hand, IS ryan adams. she is all about him which has caused me to fall back into my ryan adams love.



easy tiger makes me so happy and proud. proud to see how he has (somewhat) straightened up his messy life, and happy because it is a reminder of so many good memories i have had with his words and his music. ive never stopped supporting him, but i needed a push from someone, to give him a better listen and some more love that he truly deserves.

lately though, between his old and current lyrics... and his blog... and his words... he has been speaking straight from my heart. so, thank you, ryan adams, for being true. or staying real. and for saying it how it is.

Keep Making Art,
and when you get tired; eat,
and/ or watch movies, every kind
make tea and then Keep Making Art.
That Will Keep You From Becoming
"THEM"
- You Know-
those people
who could, but don't
and know there is nothing left for them
them, the terrible them
that tear down the ones
WHO NEVER GAVE UP
on the dream
because you and me kid,
we were made of that stuff
and were born to dream,
even sometimes
for "them"
- ryan adams.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

backwards with time.



no seriously. that is my favorite video. no matter how many times i watch it, tears pour off my face because i laugh so hard.

obviously it has been a slow week if this is all i have to share you with all.

xo.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

PS:

bored tomorrow night?

chris garneau is having a show at the canal room tomorrow night, (which is on w. broadway at canal st). it's his last ny date for awhile and tickets are only $15! plus, the canal room is such an interesting and posh 'venue' if you dare even call it that. if my plans weren't set for tomorrow evening, i would be there.

tickets available via canal room website or at the canal room box office.

please go and show some support. chris is such an amazing, genuine and talented guy.

living of love.

with march long gone, it's time to welcome in april! this means we are closer to summer, which is closer to sundresses and the beer garden in astoria, and day trips to the wineries out east. this also means sweaty subway cars and hairy men in bathing suits at tobay beach. just some of the many perks of being a new yorker during the hot months.

on my way to work this afternoon, i tried to think of what good things came into my life during the dull month of march. i couldnt think of one thing. i literally had to plop down, open my planner and see what i did and where i was this past month. then it all came back to me. these are the top three big moments of march 2doubleOH8.

first and foremost:



i thought august: osage county was my favorite piece on broadway, but that all changed when boston native, 'lers, came to visit for a weekend. we last minute decided to buy rush tickets to see passing strange - and clearly passing strange won over and now holds the number one spot in my heart and soul. it was one of the most moving, beautiful and emotional pieces i have seen on broadway in a LONG time. when i first saw spring awakening, i felt the same way, but seeing passing strange left me utterly speechless and needing more. i cried through the end, and i dont know if the tears coming down my chin were from the actual scenes, or from the beauty of the play or from the music. everything about that show was remarkable. i cannot rave about it enough. not to mention the cast is GENIUS. stew is a god. and the people who represent his work... absolutely in love.

secondly.



after all the hype and good praise blake bashoff has been getting in spring awakening, i finally decided to check it out. after seeing it in december and watching gallagher pour his heart out on the stage during his last, i was convinced that whoever this blake was, was not going to fill the shoes that were once on that stage and i didnt want anything to do with it or the show. plus, i also needed a break from seeing it so often in december. by march though, my three months had passed and i was due to show my face to the beautiful cast and see how everyone was doing. i was nervous upon seeing someone who was deemed as 'very broadway' to replace the folky-rock voice i was used to with gallagher. but the second bashoff set foot on the stage, i was in love. he has done so many remarkable things with his portrayal of mortiz that it is wonderful. dare i even say, he may be better in SOME parts then the person who originated that role... which says a lot (and i mean, a lot) coming from me. i was, and have been, very pleased with bashoff so far.

& thirdly...
as many of you know, i barely buy things full price at the gap. even with my discount, it always gets marked down a week later and i am miserable. i will splurge on ANYTHING, except for things at the gap. weird, i know.

however! the instant i saw this sweater... i had to have it. i am abolutely in love with it, and own it in every color. the coral is my favorite. i only bought one on sale (yes! they are on sale!) but the rest, full price (plus discount). you will not go wrong with one of these little cardigans. so perfect to layer or wear with a cami.



and of course... there were more little things. the beautiful set eatc/osp had at highline ballroom. my family's annual st. patty's day dinner EVEN THOUGH WE'RE ITALIAN, my trip to philadelphia, wearing my hair curly every day during the month (shocker!), re-living the beautiful story of a tree grows in brooklyn, wilco and vampire weekend being on snl (back to back!), my shopping experience at ikea and of course, the vegan dinner party!

that's all kids. here's to a new month and new possibilities. gypsy and in the heights are on my list of shows to see, as well as adding in passing strange once more, at least. i am a granny this week with bedtime and will be seeing that guy, blake bashoff, tomorrow night, so a girl needs her beauty rest.

till next time. xo.